Times they are a changing...again...
This month started off with a bang! Katie's 22nd bday on cinco de mayo was awesome... A few days later though I had to say goodbye to a really good friend... Zach Crofton aka asain zach moved to oregon, I miss him tons... THough his parting wasnt as hard as it should have been, I was so excited because Matt was coming the next day from Denver! we hadnt seen eachother for 6 months and I had missed him so much... That week was a whirlwhin.... We hung out on the couch watching movies a lot, drinking more than I have in a long time... hehehehe... On tue we went to a Mariners game against Tampa and we WON! Spending time in seattle was a blast...We also made a trip of to Vancouver BC which was fun though I started a dranken spat... For the most part we had a blast together, accept on sunday when I had to go to work, and I woke up an hour late and was still drunk.... I got my hang over at work... Needless to say I have no idea what I said at orientation... The new kids most be thinking God thats our manager???? I still had vomit in my hair! Matt came to pick up and we went and got stain remover for the red stain that ended up on my carpet.... Waistbasket is red... Sunday night was difficult because I started getting upset early that he was leavign the next day... Mon you guessed it I went on a crying jag, and probably annoyed the shit outta matt... boys dont like it when u cry for 3 hours that they're leaving when they havent left yet.... But luckily he had prepared for that... We had spent a really fun time together that week, and to pack 6 months of not seeing eachother into one week is hard.... Especially when you do have a good time and enjoy his company... Goodbyes are really really tough for me... Plus I was sick from the first day he got there, and I am still sick today... I felt like it would have been more fun if i wasnt coughing up green stuff and not being able to sleep all week. I know he had a good time too, but he was excited to get back to his life in Denver, and start a new job... I was mostly upset because I dont know when I'll see him again... I could quite possibly never see him again... I think thats what got me so upset that whole day... We had spent an amazing week together and i want to be around him and now I dont know when that will happen or ever happen again... Whats ment to be will happen though and I'll just have to let it go... Hearing his voice over the phone or texting eachother simply does not replace real contact... But I have realized with what ever happens I want him to be happy and if I would have just listened to what he was saying about how we have no control over the future and just enjoy the time we have together now I would have stopped crying and just enjoyed being with him for those last few hours... The lesson was learned and used later on in the week...
Thur Megs and I went out for our last night together for a few months... She's going back to Alaska and then to germany for the summer... Lucky for me she's a super senior and is comign back in the fall... We went to E9 and ran into casey, rocky and theyre friend jeff, we ended up taking shots and drinking a lot... I hadnt eatin all day I'm pretty sick and have had purple and white dots on the back of my throat since tue... So I get drunk enough to chock down pizza so they're something in my tummy... Drunk off of three drinks mind u... Drinking the week before and tryiing to keep up with matty like I used showed me tolerance is down... So we decided to walk up to chop sticks where I run into becky and lissa which reminded me theres still going to be friends here too if i just call them... Its ladies night at chopsticks drinks are hella cheap so casey starts throwign down 100 dollar bills and saying go order rounds of drinks because u guys get them cheaper... We are wasted by the time we get back to megs house, we eat crackers and talk for an hour with the boys... Megs had stolen the 1 ball from sigma nu so then i decide for some reason that i should have it so now i have the one ball from sigma nu sitting on my window sill... I dont even know anyone in that house anymore... (THough I did run into a kid named carson last night while haning with Kjirsten so maybe ill give it to him... ) So I get home with only 4 hours to sleep before work... Have an amazing day at work... get off late and have to go take megs to the airport... She's not done packing and running around frantically at 7pm her flights at 930... We still had to drop off her car at the storage unit. We finally drop her off at the airport at 830. Though I was getting really sad and wanting to bust out in the same type of tears I cried on matts last day I held them off... Giving her a hug goodbye i felt them rising and dropping her off in the same spot that i had to leave matt at was crushing me... As soon as I pulled out i tried not to let them come up... and i didnt the whole car ride until I got home then i was a sob story... But atleast i didnt ruin the last hour i had with her... We talked like normal... I'll most likely be subletting her room for the summer by UPS... Then I started crying because I realized most of my friends are scattering they're moving on to new cities and new lives and im here still going back to UPS for grad school... why did i only apply to two grads schools? what was i afraid of? I should have applied to schools all around the west coast! I could be starting over someplace new too... though i had very little time to actually apply any where... I started talking to asain zach online... He put things in perspective for me... Then Kjirsten called and wanted to hang out because this is here last week here... so I went out to magoos with her and her bf aaron. We ran into kids who are now going to be seniors but were sophs when i was a senior and that made me feel old. They were on a 21 bday run... that made me feel even older... We just sipped on our beers and watched them get fucked up... Then we went to a new place that just opened on 6th and union called ferallis and had pizza and watched the kids get wasted some more... Ended up talking to a kid named carson for a long time... Then Kjirsten was tired so we went home early on a friday night... I was bummed but had only had 4 hours of sleep the night before so i was excited to sleep. We may go out tonight and hopefully mira comes out tooo I miss her and havent seen her forever, she was really busy this past semester with her new bf two jobs, school and gphi... so hopefully ill get to say goodbye to her...
Caro's coming this wed though... I'm totally stoked for that... The only problem is I have to pack my apartment up and move! I should really start doing that.... but since im a chronic procrastinatior i wont... Plus i need to know if im moving into meg's house for the summer or not first, i probably will be moving in june 1... but if not im moving home to the harbor YUCK! no i dont wanna live with my parents again im almost 24... plus i need to find a new job this one sucks and im done with it... But i must pay the bills... I'm sooo stoked for her to come though... I havent seen her in a year! I cant believe its been that long... But i know its only for a week and then she'll be gone again... I was talking with her last ngiht and she was like why dont u move here with me... Let me tell ya i'm thinking about it... even though im sad here and want to start over its still hard to give up the place where u grew up and love so much... filled with the right people this place is amazing... but those people are gone even my highschool friends who im close to have scattered for the most part and the ones who havent seem to be reliving past glories... I dont want to do that i want to create new ones... I really want to go to grad school though thats super important to me... I can still go to seattle u in the winter if i want... Or I could look at transfereing to another school someplace else... That has me excited... So i think i'll spend fall semester here goign to ups... Which has already proved difficult, the class im taking is in a class room i had my senior year... I look out the windows and it puts me back to that time... I think about gphi and how much fun i had with that... All the friends i made who are no longer there, the two guys really special guys i met there and how we met... The people i still expect to see on campus, i feel they're ghosts everywhere... I dont think i can concentrate when i have feelings like that happening... So what i maybe doing is hacking it out for one more semester... Then transfering... I think i'll probably do it where i know someone. Like AZ and living with bj, or san fran and live with caro... Seattle or san diego... some place.... different... a new begining because reliving old new begining is hurting too much... Well i guess this is a long post... i havent posted in a long time, and strangely this helped me vent and i feel a little better... To all those I love, care about, and who are special to me i hold u dear and close in my heart... Even though i may not call enough or keep in good contact like i should know that i am thinking about u.... Now off to start my day off, i wish i was over this cold soo i can go back to working out...
Thur Megs and I went out for our last night together for a few months... She's going back to Alaska and then to germany for the summer... Lucky for me she's a super senior and is comign back in the fall... We went to E9 and ran into casey, rocky and theyre friend jeff, we ended up taking shots and drinking a lot... I hadnt eatin all day I'm pretty sick and have had purple and white dots on the back of my throat since tue... So I get drunk enough to chock down pizza so they're something in my tummy... Drunk off of three drinks mind u... Drinking the week before and tryiing to keep up with matty like I used showed me tolerance is down... So we decided to walk up to chop sticks where I run into becky and lissa which reminded me theres still going to be friends here too if i just call them... Its ladies night at chopsticks drinks are hella cheap so casey starts throwign down 100 dollar bills and saying go order rounds of drinks because u guys get them cheaper... We are wasted by the time we get back to megs house, we eat crackers and talk for an hour with the boys... Megs had stolen the 1 ball from sigma nu so then i decide for some reason that i should have it so now i have the one ball from sigma nu sitting on my window sill... I dont even know anyone in that house anymore... (THough I did run into a kid named carson last night while haning with Kjirsten so maybe ill give it to him... ) So I get home with only 4 hours to sleep before work... Have an amazing day at work... get off late and have to go take megs to the airport... She's not done packing and running around frantically at 7pm her flights at 930... We still had to drop off her car at the storage unit. We finally drop her off at the airport at 830. Though I was getting really sad and wanting to bust out in the same type of tears I cried on matts last day I held them off... Giving her a hug goodbye i felt them rising and dropping her off in the same spot that i had to leave matt at was crushing me... As soon as I pulled out i tried not to let them come up... and i didnt the whole car ride until I got home then i was a sob story... But atleast i didnt ruin the last hour i had with her... We talked like normal... I'll most likely be subletting her room for the summer by UPS... Then I started crying because I realized most of my friends are scattering they're moving on to new cities and new lives and im here still going back to UPS for grad school... why did i only apply to two grads schools? what was i afraid of? I should have applied to schools all around the west coast! I could be starting over someplace new too... though i had very little time to actually apply any where... I started talking to asain zach online... He put things in perspective for me... Then Kjirsten called and wanted to hang out because this is here last week here... so I went out to magoos with her and her bf aaron. We ran into kids who are now going to be seniors but were sophs when i was a senior and that made me feel old. They were on a 21 bday run... that made me feel even older... We just sipped on our beers and watched them get fucked up... Then we went to a new place that just opened on 6th and union called ferallis and had pizza and watched the kids get wasted some more... Ended up talking to a kid named carson for a long time... Then Kjirsten was tired so we went home early on a friday night... I was bummed but had only had 4 hours of sleep the night before so i was excited to sleep. We may go out tonight and hopefully mira comes out tooo I miss her and havent seen her forever, she was really busy this past semester with her new bf two jobs, school and gphi... so hopefully ill get to say goodbye to her...
Caro's coming this wed though... I'm totally stoked for that... The only problem is I have to pack my apartment up and move! I should really start doing that.... but since im a chronic procrastinatior i wont... Plus i need to know if im moving into meg's house for the summer or not first, i probably will be moving in june 1... but if not im moving home to the harbor YUCK! no i dont wanna live with my parents again im almost 24... plus i need to find a new job this one sucks and im done with it... But i must pay the bills... I'm sooo stoked for her to come though... I havent seen her in a year! I cant believe its been that long... But i know its only for a week and then she'll be gone again... I was talking with her last ngiht and she was like why dont u move here with me... Let me tell ya i'm thinking about it... even though im sad here and want to start over its still hard to give up the place where u grew up and love so much... filled with the right people this place is amazing... but those people are gone even my highschool friends who im close to have scattered for the most part and the ones who havent seem to be reliving past glories... I dont want to do that i want to create new ones... I really want to go to grad school though thats super important to me... I can still go to seattle u in the winter if i want... Or I could look at transfereing to another school someplace else... That has me excited... So i think i'll spend fall semester here goign to ups... Which has already proved difficult, the class im taking is in a class room i had my senior year... I look out the windows and it puts me back to that time... I think about gphi and how much fun i had with that... All the friends i made who are no longer there, the two guys really special guys i met there and how we met... The people i still expect to see on campus, i feel they're ghosts everywhere... I dont think i can concentrate when i have feelings like that happening... So what i maybe doing is hacking it out for one more semester... Then transfering... I think i'll probably do it where i know someone. Like AZ and living with bj, or san fran and live with caro... Seattle or san diego... some place.... different... a new begining because reliving old new begining is hurting too much... Well i guess this is a long post... i havent posted in a long time, and strangely this helped me vent and i feel a little better... To all those I love, care about, and who are special to me i hold u dear and close in my heart... Even though i may not call enough or keep in good contact like i should know that i am thinking about u.... Now off to start my day off, i wish i was over this cold soo i can go back to working out...
posted by Chelle @ 11:25 AM
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